“I CAN DO WITHOUT YOU”. What’s Wrong With It?

I’m an extremely optimistic person. I’m born to aspire and the more the obstacles, the more I see opportunities. More so, as a believer in the Lord Jesus Christ, this nature is absorbed and boosted beyond measure.

So for me, to believe is to live. I don’t just believe, I live and teach that the best is yet to come. This is the foundation for Motivational Speaking, helping people achieve more despite obviously impossible circumstances.


With Social Media Platforms, motivational speaking/writing has gone to another level.

Virtually everyone is open to such messages like, “Yes You Can”, “Be Your own Boss”, If You Believe It, You Can Achieve It”…and lots more. The fact is that we have more people reading and listening to life changing messages, and certainly, they’re changing. But here are my two major concerns:

1. Optimism is not stupidity.


When a baby tells its mother, “Mum, I can do without you, I can make it, I have the power to survive and live without you“, the baby is right. Afterall, there are millions of motherless babies and orphans who turned out to become great leaders and legends. So without “the mother”, the baby can survive.

What’s missing in this argument is that, at the moment, without “the mother”, the baby will suffer. While dumped and abandoned in the cold at the mercy of compassionate humans, the baby will starve and is at risk of death.

Secondly, in the event it survives, the baby “actually” didn’t survive without “a mother figure”, but its own mother. It was fed and nursed by a “Mother”. So,

For a Baby to claim it’ll survive without the services of a mother is sheer stupidity.

The very concept of a mother used here, suggests the different interdependent relations we share in life. They could be actual parent-child relationships, business partnerships, spousal relationships or teacher-student relationships.

These are people whose contributions increase the benefits the relationship is meant to offer. To deny them, makes the journey rough, unproductive and unnecessarily stressful.

2. Our individuality doesn’t deny the foundations of our humanity.


We are humans, a race, a people whose shared interests give meaning to life. Though created individually, we grow as a people. The scientific and technological inventions we enjoy today were based on someone’s passion to solve a human problem.

In fact, the more we think beyond ourselves, the more we achieve, both personally and for the world around us.

While we can, as individuals, we can achieve much more as humans.

Isolating oneself to achieve a big dream and losing the sense of humanity is actually counterproductive. In the end, the big dream is only as good as it pleases its consumers- the very humans you abandoned. That’s why companies all over the world are dying to get your feedbacks on their products.


We are the people that actually matter. Not you. Not me. But US.

We can make a list of all the things one may consider worth having and a proof of our success. Yet, none of them surpasses the success of a human community. Think about it.

You drive the latest Ferraris, live in the best houses anyone could imagine and have numerous sources of income. Yet, you live in these spaces of glory alone, isolated from what makes you truly human.

We often destroy relationships and peaceful communities, just to build an industry. Ain’t these the very problems we face on a larger scale with Climate Change and the Greenhouse effect? For God’s sake,¬†we can’t destroy an ecosystem without paying for it.

When your Optimism destroys a community, you’re simply acting stupid.

It’s like the baby who starves because it refused to be a baby and accept its mother. It’ll probably die, the mother will cry, the family will explode all because of the baby’s stupidity and “infantile pride”.

When your Optimism takes you backwards, you’re simply acting stupid.


Imagine waking up today and deciding not to use a car anymore or enjoy all the technological achievements of the 21st century, because you want to build your own world. You’ll be like the Ape Man/Woman walking amongst us. That’ll be awkward. We won’t clap for you, for acting stupid.

Any optimistic views borne out of sheer human pride will destroy us in the end.

Yes you can do without him or her, but to what end?


Don’t lose tomorrow fighting yesterday.

Let your optimism take you forward.

Let it build a better world.

Let it heal and not destroy.

Let it inspire faith and courage to achieve more, not just for you, but for the world around you.


To believe is to live.
To believe in going backwards is to be stupid.

So, the next time you think you can, you’re right. But also remember why you can:

because we’re better of together and if you can do without us, may be you need us more than we need you.


Cut off your ego, not your finger.

The best is yet to come.
Keep Moving Forward!

Feel free to share this post and inspire someone today.



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